between my legs a little trail of black dust.

boydrice:

My 15-year-old son, Wolfgang, has had a tempestuous relationship with climate conditions since before he could even speak. He is endlessly fascinated by the weather, and not knowing what is happening with it for even half an hour is torment to him. When he was one year old I’d have to carry him around town every day to check all the satellite dishes. His first words were about clouds, wind, and mud, and most of his words ever since have been centered on those same topics. His artwork, from childhood finger paintings to current oils on canvas and sculptures, heavily features erupting volcanoes, obliterating snow, and hail. Even his religious beliefs—which no one in his family or among his friends share—begin and end with the natural disasters of the apocalypse and the balminess of heaven.

Lisa Carver: How many times a day do your sister and I ask you to stop talking about the weather?
Wolfgang Carver: I would say about ten. It’s less since I got my 24-hour weather radio, because I can have it anywhere I want and I don’t have to turn on the TV every hour and wait for the weather.

What does the weather radio talk about?
How it’s supposed to be that day or the next few days, or barometric pressure, or wind chill in the Dover area, Maine, Boston, and Mount Washington. Plus they give warnings, like if there’s flooding, go to high places. “Turn around, don’t drown.” Or if there’s lightning, don’t touch metal.

How do they make the forecast?
Satellites in space and satellite dishes on earth receiving signals.

You have two CDs that you listen to over and over when you’re not listening to your weather radio. What are they?
Al Gore and a storm CD—thunder and rain, that’s all.

What does Al Gore talk about?
The world ending. And how we’re infecting the environment. And a hole in the atmosphere we made with pollution that the sun gets through. And the greenhouse effect—lots and lots of heat getting trapped, changing the weather.

What does weather mean to you?
It always makes me feel safe because… if I don’t listen to it, how will I know what’s going to happen?

What’s the forecast for the next few days?
Sunny today, around 20 degrees, but wind chill zero or below zero. Storm coming in Saturday, coming from out West. Three to six inches of snow Saturday night and Sunday.

How would you describe our family vacation to Florida?
It was between 70 and 80 degrees. There was a storm. Gusts of wind picked up sand and got it in my eyes. Hurricane Ida was in Texas and then Jacksonville and turning down and swirling in the Gulf coming around the tip of Florida to us where we were in Miami.

What would stop you—rain, sleet, hail, or snow?
I think hail. Sometimes it’s four inches across and I could get knocked out.

What’s your favorite weather?
Thunderstorms. 

How did you feel when those bullies snatched your umbrella and stomped on it?
I felt like I was cold and wet. It was raining off and on all day. This was around 2:30 PM, walking home. It was around 65 degrees Fahrenheit. But I was walking through the forest, in the shade, so it was probably more like 64 or 63.

What are you most afraid of?
The apocalypse, because it’s about people dying, and I don’t want to die yet. No one really knows how the earth will end, but my theory is earthquakes, volcanoes erupting, tornadoes, thunder, and lightning all around the world.

Tell me more about the apocalypse.
If people are worshipping the devil in the form of witchcraft and bad movies, then God would burn the earth when he comes here. But we would be safe in the gates of the Holy City. The weather is sunny there. And warm, but we wouldn’t feel it the way we do now because we wouldn’t be in the form our bodies are in now—no sickness and broken bones. We’d be flying through the warmth more than walking. We would still have our heart and soul, which would feel love and happiness but doesn’t touch things the same way, doesn’t feel hurt. Everyone would be vegetarians, so animals would be free. We’d have a new earth, all pure and sweet, and it would be only spring and summer. No air pollution.

What was that DVD you picked out in Walmart yesterday?
It was about natural disasters: earthquakes, tornadoes, fires, and floods. But I ended up not buying it because I got scared.

But you didn’t want any other DVD, even though I said you could have any DVD at all. It’s funny that what you’re most attracted to in the world is also what most terrifies you. Some people are like that about love. It’s very powerful.
I’m attracted to knowing what’s going to happen. I feel safe then.

Are you interested in dating ever?
I don’t know yet. I think I’ll just wait, because I don’t want to end up like you.

[laughs] End up like me how?
Divorcing everybody.

Oh my God. OK, I’ll take that hit. I won’t edit that out. Do you have any obsessions other than the weather?
Time. [gets up and leaves the room]

Did you just go check the microwave to make sure it was on the time rather than how many seconds left to cook?
Yeah.

We have ten other clocks in the house. Why do you always have to have the microwave tell time, too?
I don’t know. So I won’t be late? [laughs]

(via critischism)